A few things I learned at the Orphan Summit

I'm finally getting a chance to write down some of the many things I took away from the Orphan Summit last weekend.

I believe it was Doug Sauder, author of, "The One Factor" who said that the orphan crisis is obviously a problem that won't be solved in a day. We must have patience but also we must have an urgency in getting there. Proverbs 31:8-9 says, "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy."

If we are only motivated by the need, we will soon run out of gas. I've heard many Christians say they are adopting because God commands it..."take care of the orphans and widows"...among many other verses. I've also heard Christians say they hate when people use that reason for adoption. For years, I've tried to understand this. Obviously, it is a command of God and we are to obey His commands, right? The conclusion I've come to is some believe using this command as their primary reason to adopt is condescending to the child...sort of a 'rescue mentality' which offends them.

For us, to be honest, we never thought we 'needed' a bigger family, as others have indicated. The reason we've adopted is well, the first time God told me to in a dream and the second time, He impressed on both our hearts that there was a girl whom we needed and who needed us. God's command to take care of the orphans was a big part of this. Did we adopt just because it was our 'duty' or 'responsibility?'

No, absolutely not!

After years of thinking about this, I've come to the conclusion that it is not offensive or condescending to adopt because you simply want to follow God. Hear me out...there was a time in my life that I was lost and alone, a spiritual orphan. Then God saw me, had mercy on my, reached out to me and saved me. I now have been adopted into the family of God and He is my Abba Father, who will NEVER leave me or forsake me.

My dad died almost 9 years ago now. It was by no choice of his own, but he left me. He loved and adored me, but he left. He lives in heaven now and I cannot wait to be reunited with him someday. But on this earth and in this life, he left me. My heavenly Father will never leave me. Never.

So if I don't take offense at the spiritual state I once found myself in and the fact that I had a desperate need for saving, why would it be offensive to do what God did for me (spiritually speaking) for an orphan on earth?

I mean, He didn't do it out of duty but out of incredible love.

So it is with adoption. The source of our strength and motivation must be Jesus and His saving grace for me.

We do not adopt out of duty but from a heart of love, recognizing that adoption is a beautiful and direct picture and example of God's love for us. Adoption is the heart of God.

Al Mohler spoke about this. He said that if you look at the Bible, simply put it is about the creation-the fall (Adam and Eve sinning)-redemption (Jesus payment for our sins on the cross)-and the final consummation (eternity)

Israel was an orphan nation and God adopted them as His own.

Do you see the picture of adoption in this?

-A child is born (CREATION-every life is a gift from God)

-But for whatever reason the child is left either left by the death of a parent/s, or abandoned, they are alone (THE FALL)

-They are adopted into a family where they are loved (REDEMPTION-they are redeemed from possible death, loneliness, abuse, neglect, illness)

-And now have a forever family (FINAL CONSUMATION-HEAVEN)

The parallel is striking and obvious. Adoption is a perfect picture of the gospel.

We as Christians should be standing in line to adopt, wanting to be a reflection of the love and heart of our God.

I was so encouraged by these words but just haven't had time or the chance to put them down in words.

So this was day one of the Summit...I haven't even gotten to the brilliant message taught by John Piper. But let me tell you, it was POWERFUL and so true.

He asked the question, "What does it mean to live by faith?" Even though I read this passage of scripture many times before, I never noticed what it actually says. I'll give you the scripture and you can read it and try and figure out where he went with it. The passage is Hebrews 11:29-35. I'll give you a hint...there is a shift in verse 35 but not a break in the sequence.

I'll share about it when I get my next chance!

Blessings,
Laura

Loved the Orphan Summit

Just a quick post to say that the Orphan Summit was wonderful! So much to learn.

My head was about to explode last night after hearing Piper speak! He spoke right to Blaine and I and our adoption experience from a Biblical perspective and it just made my head spin. To the point where Advil was necessary! The other speakers were a huge blessing and encouragement in our passion to help the orphan. Being among about 1,300 like minded people was so refreshing. It was a place where we didn't feel like 'out there people' with 'out there ideas'. To be honest, sometimes it gets a little exhausting to defend and explain why we do what we do, especially when most of the world does not understand it.

Remember when I said some months back that when you live the gospel out in your life, everything ends up being upside-down? The poor will be rich, the weak are strong, the first are last, etc. All of that is opposite of what the world tells you is important. The world says, "You only live once, get all you can get, be first and be strongest and leave all others in your wake." This is not the gospel!

Anyway, Blaine and I had the privilege of meeting Eileen and Jerry. These are two people who I've admired for some time and who I can say, directly impacted my heart on adopting a teenager from Ethiopia. Here's her blog...check her out. I'll share more later on what we talked about but it was a blessing from God that I literally almost ran into her coming around a corner! God ordained meeting. www.jobsdaughters.blogspot.com

We also got a very nice surprise when, coming out of a session, a sweet lady stopped us to ask us if we had a blog. I said, "Yes." She was hesitant to tell us because she didn't want to come across as a stalker but she lives in Colorado and reads my blog! She is a mom, waiting to pass court for her gorgeous little baby girl in Ethiopia. Yep, we got to see the picture!! Cute pudgy cheeks in all their glory! When you're waiting to get your child home from Ethiopia, it is VERY fun to read other peoples blogs! She's a blessed mom and she blessed us by introducing herself to us. It's just nice to know someone actually reads this crazy blog!

I will share more about the content of the Summit hopefully tomorrow. Super busy day today getting ready for huge birthday party tomorrow.

Blessings,
Laura

Orphan Summit tomorrow!!!

I'm so excited...tomorrow is the day! I wanted so badly to go to the Orphan Summit last year but as it happened, we had the fire so that took care of that. So this year, God so graciously brought the Summit to Minneapolis and made it easy for us to attend. Thanks God!

Thought I'd list our sessions by name and description so you can see why I'm so excited.

Giving Voice to the Orphan-Dr. Karyn Purvis Learn how to become a true advocate for orphans and foster youth. (this woman is amazing and has a gift for understanding kids who've come from 'hard places'. Check her videos out on YouTube if you have a child you're struggling to understand! She's the best I've ever come across!)

Orphan Permanency: How can we achieve it?- Examine one of the most important questions in global orphan care: what are truly 'permanent' solutions for children and how do we find them?

Best Practices of Church to Church Orphan Care Partnerships- Survey top examples and key principles for lasting relationships between U.S. and indigenous churches for effective, on the ground orphan care.

The Financial Challenge of Adoption and How the Local Church Can Respond-Get to know available resources and services that enable churches to help adoptive families to overcome the biggest barrier to adoption: money.

The Communications Stack: A Model of Creating and Maintaining an Effective Web Presence

The Church as an Alternative to the Foster System-Learn how to replicate a model that is currently turning the Illinois' State Foster System on its head...and transforming churches in the process.

There are so many choices and we couldn't sign up for them all but I will be buying some sessions on CD, that is for sure! There are over 1,000 people signed up for this event from all over the U.S. It makes my heart sing to know this and to see all these people, who all share the same heart for the orphan will just be amazing.

Hope to meet some friends who's blogs I follow. Can't wait!!!

Pray for the people who are speaking and attending that hearts would be motivated and lives would forever changed for the benefit of the orphan and for the kingdom.

Blessings,
Laura

Some pics of our spring break trip

Ok, I REALLY need to know how to fix whatever happened to my blogspot settings. It still won't let me post text after each picture. Oh well...

In the first picture (I hope) you see all of us, minus De at "Disney." For all of us to get into Disney World, it would have cost about $1000 for a DAY! Well, that was not going to happen but I did want the kids to "feel" like they went to Disney World so we visited the Disney Marketplace, which is just restaurants and shops that you can go to without paying to get into the park. The 2 little ones were thrilled! We spent 45 minutes there, looking at all the Disney merchandise in the stores. We even let Mihiretu and Misganaw pick out a toy, which was a Toy Story play set. Both picked the same thing! Then we bought huge suckers for all the kids (even bringing one home for Blake so he could "feel" like he'd been with us!) and we got out of "Disney World" for $40!! When we left, Mihiretu with all enthusiasm said, "THANKS, Mom and Dad, for taking us to Disney World!!" Misganaw agreed with him and we just said, "You are very welcome," and everyone left feeling satisfied. Someday I know we'll have to tell them they didn't actually go to Disney World, but it worked for now!

The next picture is of the us...the old people!

I wanted you to see a side by side picture of Aliya and Mihiretu. Now you can really see just how much they look alike!! That is why when we saw the picture of her, we all said, "She looks just like Mihiretu!!"

Aliya and her Dad...can I just say how much this girl LOVES her dad??? She is CRAZY about him and he adores her.

Then, finally the 3 youngest at Busch Gardens (I think)...a park we could afford!

Blessings,
Laura

Nicest neighbors

My sweet, lovely neighbor ladies organized a lunch date so they could welcome Aliya to the neighborhood on Saturday. We had a great time visiting and they all introduced themselves to her so when she's sees them in the neighborhood, they won't be strangers to her.

Now just how thoughtful is that? Especially in a day where we don't even know our next door neighbors name! There were 12 of us...12 on a beautiful, sunny Saturday. Of course there was food involved, so that always helps...and visiting, we love to do that! But more than that, there was a genuine desire to meet and know the new girl in the neighborhood and make her feel loved and welcome.

They bought her a hoodie with our local school team on it and a gift certificate to American Eagle, which incidentally she had spent by Saturday night!

I'm really sorry for everyone who doesn't live in my neighborhood! You can have really nice neighbors too, but probably they won't be as nice as mine. Sorry!!:-) I'll let you know when a home in our neighborhood comes up for sale.

She spent the evening at my moms house and they went to the Mall of America, shopped and had dinner there. This was her first sleepover and she loved every minute. Next time Grandma wants her for the WHOLE day, not just the evening. Just not enough time to do everything they wanted to do, like bake cookies.

On a different topic...don't laugh (especially you, Jill!) I need some help with keeping my schedule organized. What I do now is have a calendar on the wall and that's how I keep track of everything. Mostly it works. But on Saturday, I kind of forgot something important.

Mihiretu had dress rehearsal from 10-12 on Saturday morning for his choir concert which was on Sunday.

Here is what we did on Saturday:

Got up and made French toast. Cleaned that up.

Aliya had another hair appointment at 11:00.

Lunch with the neighbors at 1:15, which we were a little late for because of the hair appointment.

Come home, work on laying down fertilizer and grass seed (from the mess left from the fire...vehicles fixing the house)
Get done at 8:00.

Get Misganaw into bed. Mihiretu is having a sleep over with a friend.

Aahhhhh, climb into hot tub and uhhhh-ohhhhh. What did I forget? Dress rehearsal and also Mihiretu is supposed to be at church at 8:25 am to sing in the first service. Oh, boy!

I knew about it but just didn't write it down. Totally my fault!

I'm finding it hard to keep track of everyones stuff.

Does anyone have any good ideas? They really have to be easy for me. Nothing electronic, unless it is super easy. Nothing big to carry around in my purse.

I wish they sold extra memory for my brain like they do for computers.

Anyone?? Help!

Blessings,
Laura

Aliya's wonderful transition

Before Aliya came home, I was really prepared for a challenge. I mean, how could she not be challenging...she's 14, she's changing cultures and everything she has ever known is changing, she is starting a new school with hard curriculum and all in English to boot, she must learn to live within a family-all of whom she doesn't know, she's losing all her friends...see what I mean? People always think, "She's gaining so much-a loving family, a warm bed, schooling" and all that is true but from her perspective, she's lost a great deal.

I expected a lot of crying, tantrums, sassiness, disrespect, hoarding food and her wanting to be alone in her room.

We were prepared for this.

I read about adoptive families having these challenges all the time, especially when they've adopted an older child. My heart breaks for them and when I read about them, I say a prayer for them to have the strength and stamina to persevere. These kids are worth it and deserving of parents who will go the extra mile (or a million miles in some case). I have so much respect for parents who are going through these difficult times with their kids.

That's why I stand in awe of Aliya. We expected all of these things, not because we're fatalists but because we're realists. But we haven't seen ANY of these things with her. And we can take NO credit for this...it's all God. It's nothing we've done.

When I wake her up every morning for school, she is happy. She gets right up (even though she's not an early morning person) and comes down for breakfast. She gets dressed, brushes her teeth, I do her hair, hug her goodbye and Blaine drops her off at school. I pick her up from school and she always greets me with, "Hi Mom!" I ask her if she's had a good day and she always tells me, "Yes." Then she tells me about her day and we usually have some laughs and I find out how much homework she has for the night.

She always looks forward to Katie coming home from school! She loves her so much.

That's our days and our evenings vary but always include eating dinner together, working on her homework...if it's math, it's Dad, everything else is me.

She LOVES her dad. She doesn't hesitate hugging him. She loves him to laugh with her. She trusts him... I can see that.

Aliya has a great sense of humor and she's funny everyday.

Yesterday, when I picked her up from school she told me that she got her science test back and that she got 13 wrong out of 42, I think. I was shocked! I asked her if she did it all by herself. She said that she did.

"With NO help??"

"The teacher read it to me but didn't tell me the answers."

This test was on 'protists'. What the heck is that? I don't even know.

My 14 year old daughter, who only learned speaking English just over a year ago and has only been in America just over 8 weeks and who is in 7th grade got a 71% on her science test...all by herself. We didn't even study for it...I didn't know it was coming! How did she do this?? I saw the test. She did do it.

All I can say is she is incredibly observant and a great listener. She picked this all up in class!

She wasn't happy with this grade. At the Layla school (her orphanage school), she got "better grades than that!" That's her new word for now, "BETTER." She uses it all the time! When she says it, it sounds like, "Baaayder." Blaine teases her about that and she laughs and loves it!

Oh, my goodness...this girl! We reassured her that this was excellent and then I think she realized just what she'd accomplished. We are so proud of her!

I don't know why we've had such an easy transition with Aliya. Maybe God thinks we've already gone through enough challenges for now.

Please be encouraged if you are considering adopting an older child. I always say, "Be prepared for a challenging transition" but you don't necessarily have to expect it:)

I can honestly say that it seems like she's been with us forever (other than language issues). She is THE perfect fit for our family and having her join our family has been an absolute breeze. Piece of cake. One of the most enjoyable experiences of our lives.

And I think hers, too!

Blessings,
Laura

I'm looking for him!

Aliya was digging through the refrigerator, looking for something before dinner. I asked her, "What are you looking for?" She said, "I don't know...I don't know his name." So now my daughter is looking for a guy in the frig! She commonly refers to inanimate objects as 'him' when she means 'it' but it always cracks me up!