So many times I have started this blog post only to delete it and think, "Later. I'll write it later." My thoughts and feelings have changed so much over the last year and a half that I'm glad I waited to write until now to share them.
Katie and I are incredibly close. She's not only my daughter but one of my very best friends. What a privilege to be able to say that! Not only that but De and Blaine are extremely close. They work out together every day. De admires and loves his father in law fiercely. It is something a mother could only dream of. But we have that kind of relationship.
I knew ever since we went to Ethiopia to adopt the boys in 2007, God had placed in Katie's heart a call to go back and serve Him there. We supported that idea wholeheartedly. But that was a LONG way off, right? She had to graduate first and that seemed like forever away. Well, graduation came and went. She and De married. Soon after that they wanted to have a serious talk with us. Uh oh! Here it was. What I always dreamed of for my child and my worst nightmare all rolled into one. They both had prayed and felt the Lord calling them to serve in Ethiopia. Would we support them, help them and guide them through the process?
Somehow I managed to keep it together throughout that conversation. Somehow the tears that formed in my eyes didn't roll down my cheeks. I couldn't do that to them. They were so excited!! Of course we would do whatever we could to help them through the process (and what a process it has been!).
Ever since Blake and Katie were little, I read missionary biographies to them. I so badly wanted them to see the difference one individual can make in the world for eternity. I wanted them to see how God miraculously provides and protects. As I would read the stories, I would get so moved by them that I would get choked up and hide my face behind the book. Blake and Katie would giggle. They knew how these stories moved me. They also know Mom can't cry and talk at the same time.
So now my daughter was asking ME to help send her away from ME. All I could think was, "I need her." She is a huge support for me. She helps me with the boys so much. I bounce ideas off her. She is incredibly wise and discerning for her age. She gives me advice. The boys LOVE and ADORE her and De. What will we do? What will they do?
I really struggled for months. On one hand, this is what I trained her for, right?? This is how we raised her. To serve others. To put others ahead of herself. We dedicated her to God when she was a baby and she is His, just on loan to us. There is nothing I would want more than this. If I could have known when she was a baby that one day she would be doing this, I would have BEAMED with joy! But that was a LONG way off, right?
Blaine and I have helped and guided them through this process, which has proven to be longer and much more difficult than they would have liked. Part of me thinks God did that for me. I needed the time to adjust to the idea, really. I needed to see their true longing to be there. I needed to realize they won't be truly satisfied until they are doing what God has led them to do. I know if they stayed here it would extinguish a fire in them that is a beautiful thing to see. I now see, after all the paperwork, applications, letters of recommendation, Skype meetings, interviews, schooling, expense, etc. that they are resolute in their call. I know they have stepped WAY out of their comfort zone to get to this point. (Katie tends to be shy) They have not stopped moving forward. They haven't wavered for a second.
So now I can honestly say I am ready for them to go. I am excited for them to live in Ethiopia. I am excited to see the impact they will make. I am excited to see the way they are going to change by living there. I am excited to see them serve.
I am excited. I can finally say that. I am excited!
I am waiting to get the ok to share exactly what they will be doing but I can tell you that they have a huge responsibility...HUGE. They are not concerned at all because they know God is in this. He will help them.
Katie and De hope to be there this July. They are needed there as soon as possible. Last summer we had a huge garage sale, 2 actually, to help raise money for them. They were both very successful and they were well on their way but then found out that they needed to go to Missionary Training school. Although they loved the school, what they learned there, and the people (other missionaries who will be lifelong friends), all the money they had raised was used to pay for the plane tickets and the school so they are now starting fresh.
We are having a fundraising dinner for them on May 4th. We will serve Ethiopian food, hear from them and watch a video about what they'll be doing. We have sent out invitations but if you would like to be included, please contact me.
God is good, always good.
